Smokey George

"All right. Which one of you guys are gonna lift Smokey George this time?"

Th director is furious. Twenty-seven takes now for one stupid scene inna cheap cheesy commercial. To be seen late night on th all reality channel, u know th one "I Married a Street Crazy." Pedophiles chained to little children. People eating excrement. Th kinda normal things normal real people do every day. He churns out commercials, ten or twenty a week. But this geek has to make it difficult. All cause he wants to be a star like da Flickmeister. Da Flickmeister IS a star, owns five dealerships & a bank, supporter of major conservative causes, maker & breaker of politicians. Did a basketball commercial a ways back. Made a three pointer from mid court. Probably fake, probably CG but it looks real & all th synchophants & hole kissers in town talked it real. Now Smokey George wants to do th same, wants to make a dunk shot, wants to make a dunk & hang on th rim, wants it to look real. Like this fat dumpy balding middle age disaster inna bad Afro wig can do this. No budget, has a couple of players he knows to lift him. They r gonna be late for practice & Lute's gonna be pissed. Ya don't piss Lute off in this town ... & damn he smells, hafta lift his fat ass off th ground & he smells like he hasn't wiped it in years ... Smokey George hasn't done much of anything in years ... in th sixties he wuz mildly cool. Hadda power fist decal on his white Corvette, a real Afro - at least a limp white boy Afro - mildly cool, luck w/th ladies ... then one night in da late seventies, met her atta bar, pretty drunk took her home, kissed her a while then got her panties off then then ... this dick pointing up at him! Changed his life forever, gave up on blow, Thai sticks & shiny suits ... married within a month to a woman he knew ten years before in high school. Plain - boring. Settled down, became a car dealer. Never that successful, always selling th worst cars, Pintos, Corvairs, Yugos - had th only license to deal East German imports in th country. Still th name, Smokey George - only thing smokey nowadays are the exhaust pipes of th cars he sells. Now his chance, his chance at last to be famous ...

"OK 'Th Dunk' take 28!"

Smokey George is looking forlorn & lumpy inna wrinkled gray sweatsuit under a basket looming what seems miles above him. He is sweating profusely under hot lights, under a polyester Afro. Th players rush up crouching low they grab th bunched fat of his thighs lifting him - Higher! Higher! He's at th basket! He makes th shot! Grabs th rim & HANGS! He's done it! Take that Flickmeister! It's a wrap! He'll hafta bring all his friends over to watch. It'll play between "Cop Sweat" that new show where cops kick th shit outta people for running traffic lights & "Cycle of Hate" - Odetta's gonna cut off her boyfriends' nose tonight w/a razor ...